Looking back at this year gives me so much happiness and hope for the future. If you were to ask me if I would ever imagine being where I am today last year, I probably would have laughed at you. As much of a blessing that 2018 was for me, many struggles came with it as well. The beginning of the year I had felt so incredibly empty at one point it physically felt like a void in my chest. Do you ever have those times? I felt so burned out mentally and emotionally it began to heavily affect my health. I used to wake up every morning to start my day off in a panic attack that would trigger asthma attacks. Imagining myself sitting in my old room for hours at a time in the same routine, sitting there feeling so lost. I’m very blessed to have Kiev by my side always supporting me and directing me back to my inner light.
About four months into the year I remember laying in bed with Kiev one night and putting all of our worries into perspective. That night we made a choice, a choice to chose ourselves. Choosing ourselves first in every aspect in our lives and trusting that everything will workout. From one week to the next we made a decision to move cities, a clean slate. We looked all over and couldn’t find “the one”. During that time I had almost given up completely with the idea of moving. In the midst of me crying we found it. We found the perfect apartment that had everything we looked for and more. It was a tough moving everything we owned to somewhere new, somewhere that wasn’t “home” but we did it. And on this day, I can say its been one of the best decisions in my life so far. Fast forward a couple months and we were able to invest in a brand new car.
I turned 23 this year and life isn’t exactly how I envisioned it as a child, but its so much better. Its so much better because its real. All of my struggles have brought me to this day, the last day of 2018 full of joy and love. Having issues with mental health, they tend to escalate during the holidays and this is the first year in a long time that I can wholeheartedly say “I am happy”. I’m not saying its easy or realistic that from one day to a next your life will do a full 360, but I challenge you. I challenge you to have the same mindset I did when I gave up hope. LET GO. Let go of all your fears, worries, and all the voices that tell you “no”. Replace that with “this is going to happen, this will be okay, I AM going to be happy”.
In a years time I hope to be sitting here with you reflecting on 2019 with such happiness the world sees you glowing. I hope this year brings you all the love your heart needs. All of the projects and ideas you’ve been working on will work in your favor, just start it. I pray that you have a wonderful year full of people you consider friends and family. I know you, the person reading this will have everything you need to make it through. Take each day of 2019 one at a time, each day a new lesson. And if times get hard and nothing seems to go your way, I hope you receive clarity on why things are happening for a reason. A year from now you and I will be completely different people from today. And in a year from now I hope we will be closer to the people we were born to become.
I want to thank you for all the love and support in 2018. This coming year is going to be a blessing, I can feel it. In the comments below let me know what were your biggest accomplishments of 2018.
With love and light, Happy New Year.
-Yvette V.